Apartment Manager
The new apartment manager is really cool*. She's immediately able to respond to anything that may be wrong. That her response to everything is "Ask the Department of International Relations", usually without even thinking about the question she's been asked.
* indicates sarcasm.
"Department of International Relations" = kokusai kouryuubu, usually shortened to kouryuubu, and pronounced as koryubu, which is only three syllables and much less unwieldy in conversation. You might think of it as similar to how we very rarely say "The Federal Bureau of Investigation did something to someone" unless it's a news report or you're really scratching for word count.
Just a moment ago, I talked to her about vacuum cleaner bags. Here's how the conversation went:
Kanrinin: "Good morning."
Me: "Good morning. Do you know where I can buy vacuum cleaner bags?"
K: "At... the store, they... probably have them."
Me: "Is there some special number or something?"
K: [frowning] "Ask the koryubu."
Me: "It's not open."
K: [frowning more] "Oh." Uh-oh, I may have to actually help someone. This could interfere with my TV-watching... Gotta think of something!
K: "Just write down the name of it or something." Phew, that was close. I was almost useful. Show him to try and get help from me!
Me: "Uh, right. Thank you."
While I can only imagine that's what she was thinking, it would make her actions make more sense.
* indicates sarcasm.
"Department of International Relations" = kokusai kouryuubu, usually shortened to kouryuubu, and pronounced as koryubu, which is only three syllables and much less unwieldy in conversation. You might think of it as similar to how we very rarely say "The Federal Bureau of Investigation did something to someone" unless it's a news report or you're really scratching for word count.
Just a moment ago, I talked to her about vacuum cleaner bags. Here's how the conversation went:
Kanrinin: "Good morning."
Me: "Good morning. Do you know where I can buy vacuum cleaner bags?"
K: "At... the store, they... probably have them."
Me: "Is there some special number or something?"
K: [frowning] "Ask the koryubu."
Me: "It's not open."
K: [frowning more] "Oh." Uh-oh, I may have to actually help someone. This could interfere with my TV-watching... Gotta think of something!
K: "Just write down the name of it or something." Phew, that was close. I was almost useful. Show him to try and get help from me!
Me: "Uh, right. Thank you."
While I can only imagine that's what she was thinking, it would make her actions make more sense.
Labels: ranting
10 Comments:
That really sucks. It seems like you really got along well with the last guy.
Blah.
Ouch. I'm not too fond of my apartment managers either. They're constantly closing down at random times, or ten to fifteen minutes early day. Since their business hours are the same as most work hours it means that I have to try and drive home as fast as possible to pick up any packages. Most likely, I'll get there in time but they've already closed early.
So you asked "Where do I get vacuum bags?" to which she responded "Go ask the FBI?" Yeah...that should work. I think I'll try that here...
Me: Excuse me agent Smith. Could you tell me where I could find chlorine and fertilizer? I am working on my yard.
Feds: Um...right...Could you come into this little room with all the mirrors for a while? Mr Obama has just cleared Gitmo...Have you ever visited Cuba? No? What about (insert random 3rd world country)?
Me: No. Really. I just need to clean the pool and make the grass grow. Why are you reaching for that club? Nevermind...I'll just look at Home Depot...no...really...OUCH! (Fade to black)
Yeah...you know how high security those vacuum bags are!!
But really now...what goes into them really should NOT ever come out again, so perhaps security is in order.
Are you saying something about what goes into Will's vacuum bags?
Well now, I'm not sure I want to see what goes into anyone's vacuum bags, but I suppose some deserve more security than others. As to Will's in particular, likely to find more than the average amount of airsoft rounds, but other than that, I'm not fearing too much.
I did take a look in it about a week back and it's about half airsoft rounds and half huge piles of hair from a variety of people.
You opened that bag?!!! I'm surprised the alarms didn't go off. Are you sure there weren't some hidden cameras waiting for you to try that?
How would I, if they're hidden?
Well, if the FBI comes knocking on your door...in Japan...I suppose you'll figure out that there were hidden cameras.
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